Fighting Couples: Are They Really in Love?

Is it really love when a couple can’t go a day without fighting?

Maybe not the physical fight but all those verbal arguments and disagreements that keep creeping up day after day, hour after hour. The amazing thing is they always make up after a fight because they ‘can’t live without each other’. That is why they say ‘love is never enough’.

It’s really a bad sign when a couple can’t agree on what to eat, or how to keep the toothpaste after brushing or who should do the dishes.

On the bright side, couples who fight a lot are said to have a passionate and intense love that burns and consumes everything in its path, including themselves. That is why they are always jealous and possessive. And that is why their love is the force driving them apart.

What causes these quarrels, arguments and disagreements?

Habit, attitude or just plain old stubbornness? Dis-satisfaction, thoughtlessness or insensitivity?

Well, when you love somebody, everything tends to blow beyond proportions. What you would normally ignore suddenly becomes a big deal.

But let me tell you that those arguments stem from something inside. A disgruntled, straying or hurt heart, bad attitude or just insensitivity.

Someone who is secretly wishing to be with another person will always find faults in the slightest things. A straying heart sees with only one perspective, and hurts blindly.

Someone who is secretly hurting can never be peaceful especially with the one who caused the pain. He may have caught you cheating, seen a stupid text from a so-called friend but he hasn’t said anything to you. Maybe he hopes that you will stop or you will come clean and tell him about it. So while he waits, his anger keeps increasing and the arguments escalates. Hateful words are exchanged and you’re wondering why he’s always picking a fight.

Sometimes thoughtlessness and insensitivity are a major cause of these arguments and disagreements.

Sometimes, out of habit. When two bad-mouthed people stay together. Each wants to have the last word. They just can’t seem to end it unless they have the last word. This is the selfishness that destroys the relationship. You just can’t keep quiet or apologise for the sake of peace.

Once, an old man said he lived with his wife for many many years before her death and they never had an argument. The secret was that whenever he was spoiling for a fight, she kept quiet. Whenever she was ready for a fight, he kept quiet. What more do you need to know?

Yes, the couple that always seem to be fighting may truly be in love with each other. the problem is, they might break up any time soon.

 

 

 

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Choosing the Right Lippie

There are a lot of articles about lipsticks and the right colours etc. A lot of them ring true but there are errors. Your lips are very unique, uniquely yours. It may be dry, full or thin, moist etc, but there’s always a right shade for that lip of yours.

  1. Before applying Lippie, spend at least two minutes lightly biting and chewing your lip. This makes the cracks disappear and the lips appear softer and fuller. (kissable).
  1. Highlighting or accentuating the lip with foundation or concealer may be all the rage but if not properly applied, your lips just look like they are missing a line, like you don’t know where the lips start and where the skin stops, and not in a good way.

Keep practicing till you get it right before going out in public.

How To: With a concealer that’s a shade or two lighter than your skin tone, draw a very thin line just at the lip line, dab a little bronzer to make it sparkle.

  1. Use a lip primer to get the rich colour of the Lippie. If you don’t have that, you can apply foundation all over the lip. This will even the colour of the lips and make the lipstick colour to stick out the more

Or you can first off apply a colourless lip balm, just a little on your lip especially if your about to use a matte lip gloss. This will keep the lip moist and prevent dry cracks.

  1. Try, try again! I know, it’s a lot of work. That’s why we have testers. Before buying a Lippie, go to a cosmetic gallery and make ample use of the testers. Go with a candid friend who’ll tell you the truth. For dark skinned people, dark shades of red and purple or brown usually gives a sophisticated look. Bright pink brightens and softens the face, making you look younger and innocent. Olive skinned people don’t usually look good on excessively bright colours like bright purple. Dark colours, all shades of pink usually look good. Avoid reds except matte red. Matte looks good on everybody.

For light-skinned girls, all shades of pink and red suits, especially the dark colours. But avoid rusty reds, that is orange. It usually makes the skin look washed out and drained, like  bleeded meat.

  1. Mix and Blend.

Sometimes to get that particular colour you want may involve mixing up as much as three different Lippie.

To get soft pink, red and nude can be mixed. Lining the lip is all the rage these days. You can use black lip liner to line the lip lightly and fade it. Then apply the Lippie(s) you want.

For the final touch, dab the lightest Lippie just on the inside of the lip. This makes the lip appear softer from the inside.

8 Things You Didn’t Know About Fifty Shades of Grey

This book made waves overseas. The movie is all Nigerians were interested in since Nigerians don’t really like reading. Apart from the captivating story and romantic lines, we all fell in love with dreamy actors Christian and Ana who put up a hundred percent performance of love in its biggest and most erotic form. Loved this book? Or the movie?

Here’s eight things you didn’t know about this book/movie:

  1. The author E. L. James wrote this book during her “mid life crisis”. She said it contains all her fantasies. Probably why there’s a lot of steamy scenes.
  2. Fifty shades of grey is the first in its trilogy. The second and third book are ‘Fifty shades darker’ and Fifty shades freed.’
  3. The author released a fourth book written from the perspective of the hero, titled ‘Grey: Fifty shades of grey as told by Christian’.
  4. These books earned her 95 million dollars, making her one of Forbes top highest earning authors.
  5. The movies ‘Fifty shades of grey’ earned over 569 million dollars worldwide, making it the sixth highest grossing film in 2015.
  6. Despite its success, the book and movie has received terrible, terrible and terrible reviews worldwide.
  7. A pornographic film company announced its intent to film a pornographic version of the book in 2012. (the movie itself can be said to be one if you know what I mean).
  8. The Second movie, Fifty Shades Darker is set to be released February 9, 2017. (Very soon, fellow fifty lovers.)

Any Lady That Disagrees With Papa Adeboye is Lazy: Spiritually and Physically

There has been a lot of controversy since Papa Adeboye waarned his church guys to not marry girls that can’t cook and pray for one hour.

I decided to do my research. I went online and read the arguments. Some supported him, others vehemently disagreed with him.

And I began to wonder why nobody is talking about the second part of his speech when he told the ladies not to marry jobless men. Why is nobody arguing about that one?

So everybody knows and believes that a man must be able to provide for his family but they don’t know that a woman must be able to prepare meals for her husband and children?

Isn’t that hypocrisy?

Now, a lot of people will say women also earn incomes these days.

My reply to that is this: Since women have also become income earners, have they also given the task of child bearing over to the men?

I said women who disagree with Papa are lazy for a reason. Yes, I know some ladies can’t cook but I also know that they can learn. The problem is that they are not willing to learn. It’s the laziness thing again.

There are so many online cooking tutorials but do you love your family enough to actually try?

Some persons argued some ladies have cooks to prepare meals for them. I don’t see anything wrong with that as long as you can afford it. Even though I believe their husband would really appreciate if they can prepare a meal themselves every once in a while.

As for praying for one hour, some persons argued that it’s better to pray meaningful prayers for a short time than spend hours praying without any impact. I quite agree.

But then I started to wonder. Just how many minutes will it take them to pray for their husband’s safety, health, business or job, children’s progress, joy and happiness in the home, etc?

How long will it take them to pray so their husband is protected from home-breaking jezebels?

How many prayer points can they pray in five minutes?

Even if they can’t pray for an hour yet, they can start small and develop into something better. In the long run, all Papa warned about was those lazy girls who see these home-building attributes as burdensome, tiring and unthinkable. The ‘wise’ ones will hide behind feminism.

Let’s not forget that Papa Adeboye was speaking to his church members, born again ladies and guys. He wasn’t talking to girls whose only concern was in being dope, hip and trendy. He wasn’t talking to girls who only cared about instagram and snapchat followers. He definitely wasn’t talking to guys who only cared about dope girls.

He was speaking to members of his church, people he had been grooming for a while now.

All the dope guys and chicks shouldn’t concern themselves about what Papa Adeboye is saying, even if they are born again Christians. Like papa rightly said, his message was not for everybody.

As for those people using abusive words on the man of God and calling him names, they should know that the fourty boys who mocked Elisha and called him “bald head” thought they were just having fun. Until the bears came and devoured them.

At least, they don’t have the excuse of not knowing that he’s a man of God.

The First Kiss: How to Get it Right

The first kiss should be intimate, romantic, and unforgettable. It should leave her breathless and dreamy.

You’ve gone on a few dates, you like her and now it’s time to make a move.

Stop right there. That one move that you’re approaching so casually may ruin everything if not handled properly. If you get it just right, things may work out well.

Here’s How to Get it Right

Pick a Good Spot

Don’t try to kiss her in front of her gate, when she’s worried and tensed that anybody including her dad and mum might come out any moment. Don’t try to kiss her in a public and busy place. That leaves out the romance part and you would just be embarrassing her if she’s the shy type.

 

Beware of Smells

This is probably the most important part. There are three smells you should be wary of. The smell coming from your armpits, nose, and mouth. If you can take care of these, you’ve solved eighty percent of the problem.

Wash well and use a nice perfume on your armpits, your neck, behind your ears and your collarbone. Of course, use something masculine, something that’ll always remind her of you.

Clean your nose. Use a wet cotton bud and clean up everything in your nose. I know you’re used to using your hands but try something new.

Keep a mint available and just before you lean in for that kiss, pop a mint into your mouth. Keep the mint readily available in your pocket.

 

Be Romantic

Let the lights be dim, not harsh and bright. Let soft romantic music be playing. Whenever she hears that song, she’ll always remember you. Pick a place that has all of these. It could be a movie theatre, a dark spot in a party hall or a car. Dont try to kiss her when she’s talking or using her phone. Be talking talking to her, then pause and lean in.

 

Take it Slow

Calm down bro! Dont just rush in there like an electric eel, do a sloppy job and come out feeling good. You should take your time. Don’t rush things. Be confident as you lean in. Girls like confidence. Lean in slowly and gently, let it linger.Then when your lips are almost touching, pause for a few seconds before digging in.

Ransom by Julie Garwood

The day i bought this book,  i didn’t know i was entering into sn initiation into the world of Julie Garwood. It seemed like an okay book at the time and frankly, i just needed something to read, anything at all. I think i was experiencing a novel drought, you know when you don’t have any new books and all your novels friends seem to be in the same boat. So i snuck out of school after classes, got the book and went back to the dorm. And it began, a book so captivating that you literally can’t put it down until you finish it. I think i became obsessed. I laid down on my bed all evening and deep iunto the night till i finished the book. Then i regretted why i rushed such a masterpiece. I should have savoured it, taken my time to enjoy it.

This is the love story of a girl seeking to claim nack her inheritance and revenge for her father’s death but unexpectedly, finds love in the arms of a warrior. The journey is long and perilous but you can’t help but fall in love with these two.

Really, this is a must read and a good initiation book for the novel shy.

How Long Can You Stay Without Garri (eba, loi-loi, pounded yam)

I’m a lady, I do my make-up, dress up real good and appear all trendy. But know this for a fact, I love garri. Man, I love garri. Eating garri and soup hits all the right spots. I remember once I didn’t eat garri for three days cos sometimes, I just don’t like to eat.

So my body began to feel light and my eyes began rotating. Any heavy wind would have lifted me up and carried me to Jamaica. The remedy: Garri and soup.

I know some girls and guys who saay they don’t eat garri. Some say they can do without garri for weeks, months even. Me, I say they’re lying.

In my mind, I can’t comprehend it. This is our staple food, what we’re known for. It’s the food we produce at our backyard in the village.

Growing up, I used to peel cassava and fry garri, as much as I could stand the smoke. I remember frying the last batch of garri till it becomes golden brown. Then my siblings and i would add sugar to it and then enjoy our own special snack.

Forgive me if I say anybody that says they don’t eat garri is lying.

I am not a kpako girl. I know how to eat the pizzas, and Chinese rice and all but I also love my garri.

Let’s be honest guys. My limit is three days. That’s how long I can stay without eating garri and soup. What’s yours?

How to Know He/She is Dirty?

So many beautiful girls and handsome guys out there, looking all spiffy and clean. What you don’t know is that underneath that well ironed trouser might be tattered and dirty boxers. Underneath all her expensive hair and poise might be dirty bras and dandruff. Packaging is what it is, packaging. How can you tell what’s beneath the package?

That fine boy maybe the owner and user of the towel that once was white but now is black. The pretty girl’s room may be a tsunami of clothes,bras and shoes. So how can you tell what’s underneath all that packaging?

 

Check the Nails, Toe Nails and leg in particular

This is mostly applicable to guys. Most girls do the whole manicure, pedicure thing. Shoes cover up. That’s why we’re so fond of them. They protect you from the harsh and dangerous ground. They also protect you from stares and over cleanliness. So who cares how the feet look, after all nobody will see them through your shoes.

Check the back of the leg. If they are so hard and brittle that they have cracks, mbok beware oh.

 

Ears

Nobody pays particular attention to this part of the body and for good reason. It’s way up there, hidden underneath her weave and his cute hair cut. Who has the time to look into the ears? Nobody. So one day, while he/she is sitting next to you, just take a quick sneak peek into the ears. You might see the ear wax standing and waving just at the entrance of the ear. My dear, how many cotton buds will solve that equation?

 

Condition of Boxers/Panties

I don’t normally recommend impromptu visits. That’s how many girls lost their boyfriends and guys lost their girlfriends. But to be certain of what you’re walking into, you may have to take the risk. Just wait for a day he/she tells you that they are washing. Towards evening, pay them a visit and make sure you look at he clothes hanging outside. You can then see the holes and browned armpits in his singlets. You can see the old scratchy boxers he still wears. You may catch a glimpse of her underwears in bad condition. You know if you have cold feet, nobody blames you then.

And ladies, don’t get all self righteous, saying it’s your job to make him clean, to wash for him and all that. If he can’t take care of himself, how can he take care of you? If she can’t look after herself, how will she cater for you and your kids?

Chronicles of the Witches II

The cave was dark, full of cobwebs and bats. The only light came from the smouldering fire with a large pot placed atop. Black thick liquid bubbled to and fro inside the pot. Various screeches and screams came from the pot. Occasionally, spiders and cockroaches would flitter and skiiter all around the pot without getting scalded.

The three witches sat, old and tattered with their wrinkled skin that looked as ancient as dust, few old grey hair strands on their hair. Their sagging breasts were exceptionally long. They sat and snickered, exchanging tales. This is their chronicle.

I

A beautiful woman went with her daughter to her tailor’s shop to get a dress made. The tailor’s shop was located in a plaza on the highway. As she sat and talked to the tailor, suddenly, her little daughter screamed and jumped into her mother’s arms, her nails digging into her mother’s flesh.

Surprised, the woman held her daughter close and kept questioning her. The little girl couldn’t reply. She kept looking at the roof and burying her face in her mother’s arms like she could see something sinister and hideous on the roof of the building. Being wise and Christian, the mother understood that something was amiss and immediately took her daughter home.

Years later, the plaza was being destroyed to erect another huge outlet and while the foundation was been destroyed, a calabash was found buried underneath the foundation. Inside the calabash was found a piece of cloth and a live chick, pecking away.

How does a chick stay alive for years underneath a building without dying or growing?

Still don’t believe that witches exist?

 

II

In a secondary school boarding house, a girl had a misunderstanding with a fellow student. After the conflicts and fights, the girl went away, thinking that was the end of the issue. That night in her dreams, she saw the other girl spoiling for a fight. Unwilling to be beaten, the girl engaged the other girl in a fight that lasted hours. Teeth and nail were used during the fight. At last, the girl woke up and went about her normal duties. She noticed that the other students kept giving her stares. She didn’t understand it until she went to take a bath. Scratches, teeth marks and nail marks covered her entire body. Underneath her nails she could see brown liquid that resembled blood. The shocker was when she discovered that the other girl was also covered in marks. Coincidence? I think not.

 

Kidnapped Baby Found Almost Twenty Years Later

Recently, this news caught my interest. A South African Woman has been sentenced to 10 years imprisonment for kidnapping a new born baby and raising the baby as her own child since 1997.

So for nearly twenty years, she has been the mother of somebody’s else’s baby.

The baby’s real parents found their missing daughter after their second daughter befriended a girl in school that bore a striking resemblance to her and a DNA test confirmed that the daughter’s friend was actually their first kidnapped daughter.

Stories that touch. If this were you, what would you do?